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Marriage in Islam is a blessed union between a man and woman based on love, respect, compassion and understanding. The Quran and teachings of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) provide valuable guidance on how spouses can build a happy and successful marriage. Here is some Islamic advice for spouses looking to foster love and tranquility in their relationship:

Have Taqwa (God-Consciousness)

The foundation of an Islamic marriage is taqwa or God-consciousness. When spouses are mindful of Allah and adhere to the teachings of Islam, it instills excellent virtues like patience, gratitude, honesty and selflessness into the relationship. Seek Allah’s pleasure in all that you do, fulfill the rights of your spouse and regularly turn to the Quran and Sunnah for guidance.

“And of His signs is that He created for you from yourselves mates that you may find tranquility in them; and He placed between you affection and mercy. Indeed in that are signs for a people who give thought.” (Quran, 30:21)

Express Love and Affection

Expressing love and affection is essential for nurturing intimacy in marriage. Tell your spouse you love them, compliment their strengths, and acknowledge their efforts. Small acts of consideration like greeting them with a smile, asking about their day, bringing their favorite food or leaving a kind note also demonstrate your love. Use kind words when communicating and avoid hurtful speech.

“Your wives are a place of sowing of seed for you, so come to your place of cultivation however you wish and put forth [righteousness] for yourselves.” (Quran, 2:223)

Spend Quality Time Together

Make time for each other in the midst of life’s busyness. Go for walks, read Quran together, engage in hobbies you enjoy, or share a meal. Having quality conversations, laughing together and participating in fun activities fosters closeness. Go on dates to Islamic lectures, charity events or nature spots to keep the spark alive. Prioritize your spouse and don’t let work, friends or hobbies compromise your time as a couple.

“They are clothing for you and you are clothing for them.” (Quran, 2:187)

Be Patient and Forgiving

Sabr (patience) and forgiveness nurture lasting love in marriage. Everyone makes mistakes. When tensions arise, take a step back and respond calmly instead of reacting angrily. Don’t hold grudges over petty issues or keep score of wrongdoings. Forgive freely for the sake of Allah and focus on resolving conflicts in a positive manner. Reflect on issues mindfully before addressing them. Overlook flaws graciously and treat your spouse the way you want to be treated.

“And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them, perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good.” (Quran, 4:19)

Support Each Other’s Personal Growth

Supporting your spouse’s personal growth and interests allows you both to flourish individually and as a couple. Encourage each other’s talents, goals, and dreams. Give space for alone time, hobbies and social connections that fulfill you as individuals. Listen without judgement. Provide an empathetic ear when one is struggling. Help each other become the best versions of yourselves both spiritually and character-wise. As you grow together, your marriage will also blossom.

“They (your wives) are your garment and you are a garment for them.” (Quran, 2:187)

Communicate Openly and Respectfully

Open, honest and respectful communication cements a marriage. Listen attentively to understand your spouse’s perspective. Express grievances gently using “I” statements. Avoid insulting remarks, yelling or blaming. Confide worries, hopes and insecurities and provide reassurance. Compliment and express gratitude for your partner’s efforts. Seek to resolve conflicts through calm discussion. If you need time to cool down from an argument, take a break and revisit later. Keep communication clear and purposeful.

“Speak to people kindly.” (Quran, 2:83)

“And tell the believing women…not to display their beauty except what is apparent of it, and to extend their headcoverings to cover their bosoms.” (Quran, 24:31)

Honor Privacy and Personal Space

While marriage brings spouses close, each individual still needs some privacy and personal space. Avoid pressuring your spouse to share everything. Respect their need for private time to pursue hobbies, friendships or spiritual growth. Also give space for alone time during the day. Trust each other and don’t violate privacy by monitoring emails, texts or social media. Allow your spouse to reveal their thoughts voluntarily when they feel comfortable.

“Do not spy on one another.” (Quran, 49:12)

Be Intimate and Affectionate

Physical and emotional intimacy strengthens the bond between husband and wife. Make efforts to look appealing, greet your spouse warmly and initiate closeness. Prioritize intimacy even through busy schedules. Understand if your partner is not in the mood at times and be patient. Treat them gently and lovingly during intimacy. Express shyness, modesty and fulfill each other’s rights in the privacy of your rooms. Keep intimate matters private between you as husband and wife.

“Permitted for you, during the night of the fast, that you approach your wives. They are clothing for you, and you are clothing for them.” (Quran, 2:187)

Divide Household Responsibilities

Divide household duties according to each spouse’s talents and availability. Consult together and agree on a fair allocation of tasks. The Prophet (PBUH) helped with chores and mended his own clothes. If needed, revisit the division of labor every few months. Appreciate your spouse’s efforts. Don’t burden your wife or husband beyond their capacity. Contribute with a positive attitude. If one is going through exhaustion or challenges, step up to take on more responsibility.

“The best of you are those who are the best to their wives.” (Prophet Muhammad صلى الله عليه وسلم)

Make Financial Decisions Together

Make financial decisions thoughtfully together through shura (consultation). Budget wisely and avoid debt. Spend moderately on halal pleasures without extravagance. Don’t make major purchases without mutual consent. Discuss savings goals for the future. If the wife chooses to contribute financially, appreciate her efforts. Both spouses have a right to financial maintenance and an equitable, sufficient standard of living. Resolve money matters with patience, honesty and fairness.

“Do not forget generosity between yourselves.” (Quran, 2:237)

Establish Positive In-Law Relationships

Cultivating a loving relationship with in-laws creates family harmony. Be kind, helpful and respectful to your spouse’s parents and siblings. Avoid gossip. Allow your partner to visit family with your blessing. Involve grandparents in your children’s lives. Together, make the effort to visit relatives, send gifts on Eids or help them in times of need. If conflicts arise with in-laws, address issues privately with wisdom and diplomacy. Your spouse should defend you from mistreatment.

“Be good to ˹your˺ parents, relatives, orphans, and the helpless.” (Quran, 4:36)

Make Islam the Unifying Force

Make the teachings of the Quran and Sunnah the guiding light and unifying force in your marriage. Attend Islamic lectures together, meet pious friends, go for Umrah and make faith a regular part of your conversations. Follow Islam’s guidance on all matters, whether large or small. Repent to Allah together after disputes and immediately rectify mistakes. Renew your faith regularly through acts of worship. Make your home a wholesome Islamic environment for worship, learning and ethics.

“Hold fast, all together, to the rope of Allah, and be not divided among yourselves.” (Quran, 3:103)

Trust in Allah Through Trials

Inevitably, every couple experiences ups and downs in marriage by Allah’s decree. Trials could be related to work, health, family, rifts, intimacy or raising children. Trust that Allah brings challenges for a reason. Turn to Him in dua, repentance and ask for facilitation. Do your best, then rely fully on Allah. Face issues with optimism. Learn from every challenge and let it strengthen your resilience, wisdom and devotion to each other. With tawakkul (faith in Allah), you will emerge closer and more fulfilled.

“Perhaps you dislike something which is good for you and like something which is bad for you. Allah knows and you do not know.” (Quran, 2:216)

Make Dua for Your Spouse

One of the most beautiful gifts you can give your partner is dua; sincere supplications asking Allah to guide them, envelop them in mercy and enter them into Paradise. Make it a daily habit to ask Allah to shower them with blessings, grant them excellent character, protect their faith, fulfill their hopes and grant everlasting joy between you in this life and the next. Angels will say ‘ameen’ to your loving dua.

“Our Lord, grant us comfort in our spouses and offspring, and make us good examples for the righteous.” (Quran, 25:74)

Conclusion

A successful marriage takes effort from both husband and wife to build love, trust and understanding while upholding their Islamic duties to Allah and each other. Nurture your relationship daily through patience, forgiveness, communication and acts of love. Let faith, wisdom and compassion guide your marriage. If challenges arise, hold fast to the teachings of Allah and His Messenger صلى الله عليه وسلم, who understand best the nature of men and women. Strive together on the path of taqwa, steadfastness and hope for Allah’s mercy. A tranquil, loving marriage will InshaAllah lead to happiness in this world and eternal bliss in Paradise.